CHRISTMAS CAKE

Steps:

• Sample the Vodka to check quality.
• Take a large bowl, check the Vodka again.
• to be sure it is of the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink.
• Repeat.
• Turn on the electric mixer.
• Beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl.
• Add one teaspoon sugar.
• Beat again.
• At this point it is best to make sure that the Vodka is shtill OK.
• try another cup-- just in case.
• Turn off the mixerer.
• Break 2 leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in a cup of dried fruit.
• Pick fruit up off floor.
• Mix on the turner.
• If the dried fruit gets stuck in the beaterers, pry it loose with a drewscriver.
• Sample the Vodka to check for tonsisticity.
• Next sift two cups of salt.
• Or something.
• Who giveshz a whip.
• Check the Vodka.
• Now shift the lemon juice and strain your nuts.
• Add one table.
• Add a spoon of sugar, or somefink.
• Whatever you can find.
• Greash the oven.
• Turn the cake tin 360 degrees and try not to fall over.
• Don't forget to beat off the turner.
• Finally throw the bowl through the window, finish the Vodka and kick the cat.
• Cherry Mistmas!